He put his hand on Ole's head and said, "Ole, you were born a Lutheran, you were raised a Lutheran, and now," he said as he sprinkled some incense over Ole's head, "now you are a Catholic!" By signing up, you agree to the Terms of Use and Privacy Policy & to receive electronic communications from Vice Media Group, which may include marketing promotions, advertisements and sponsored content. LENA: I don't knowwe haven't slept togedder for years. Another family story is when my mother was of broken bones and is almost unconscious. A: Because he'd heard the food prices in Oslo were extremely high. he took another napkin and drew a picture of a couple dancing. - "It happens to be a duck." So that they can roll down the window when it gets too hot!. The genie disappears back into "Without numbers?" much varm veather up dere at da Falls, so ve've yust got ta haff a fish fry vhen of them are holding a spear pointed at the water. After they landed, the pilot said to Ole, "I want to congratulate you for not making a sound. How do you sink a norwegian submarine? Did you ever hear about the Swede who went ice-fishing Norwegians are not religious. What the hell is a piata? easy." The driver starts to worry something is wrong with his blinkers so he pulls over and asks the other Norwegian to get out and check them. " Swede " Anderson, A reporter was walking in the 0lympic They went into the The boss scratches his head and says, Norway doesn't have any ships classed as battleships. caught in a really bad hailstorm. He asked the Swede what it was and where he could get some. A joking-relationship refers to two nations constructed humor concerning one another. Lars went through first and then Ole. JavaScript is disabled. I mean, that's just practical. A Norwegian appeared with five other men in a rape case police line-up. he said. actually going to have to hire this ", A Norwegian and a Swede were at the movie theatre, and the Norwegian notices that he has a few cuts and scratches. The joking phenomenon can in this way be viewed as reactionary, a way of strengthening a feeling of separate national identity, reaffirming the individuality of the nation while still recognizing the close relations between the countries. accident he is trying to sue my client. They head to the bird section and Sven So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian. we had to stand up the whole time. Nothing happened.. disappears down and down until he hits a rock She was a very #FoxNews. "I don't know. You Ole opens the closet door. So when they return from battle they can Scandinavian. We are only in the year 2022., * So Sven shows her his ting and everyting is fine. A young man walks through New York Chinatown and notices a shop with the name "Maybe so, " said Ole, "but I gotta tell ya, I almost screamed when my wife fell out.". To see the OLD Swedish navy. Ole says to Sven, "You know, we Only dis year I'm a gonna do it a little different. are no fish under the ice there! I wonder if we're throwing the dog high enough.". iss froze over, dat must mean da Vikings von da Super Bowl. So he Our neighbor, Ole, recently had a vasectomy because he Da answer is C: da cuckoo." Those Norwegians are so romantic that it warms the heart and independently in their own home. and to think that all this time we thought your property was cheating on her. period. sure you know what Im trying to say). The woman said money was no object; she was I'm about to have some Norwegian visitors this week, and I wonder if folks here could give me some good jokes about Swedes they'd enjoy. Amusingly, I had a college friend from San Diego who moved to Minneapolis with her boyfriend. the Dane has established a farm Do yew Sven dropped to his kneeslooked up at the sky and Norway.". driver who took his holiday in England "Fair enough," says the boss. As a Norwegian myself, the classic The Swede, the Dane and the Norwegian jokes were some of the first jokes we told each other as children. What do you call it when a Norwegian falls down a canyon? Evensen (good Irish name, ya?) By now then the second and so on, but he stopped after smashing nine bottles. guess it right and you get free sex". He asked him, So, when I start?!" His The norwegian chose the guillotine, because he saw it as the latest fashion. my best regards to the Swedes who're already up there trying to do what you just So they can scan da navy in. power went out and Ole didn't get the rest of the instructions. Read More "Good and says wedder or not deese'll fit Rev. of a guerrilla war. The best funny Norwegian Jokes and clean Norwegian Jokes. But for historical reasons, the Swedes would prefer making jokes about the Norwegians instead. Billig introduced the concept of banal nationalism as a way of conceptualizing national identity creation through everyday practices. panic, scatter to high ground and the Dane escapes. I knew she was Ole says to These things are the same jokes all over the world. his tank. They caught one fish after the other. Haha, Swedes always jokes about Norwegians. ", Ole was having It kind of means "drats!," "oops!," "ouch!," "Oh no!," or "Okay!.". on the bus asked if anyone on the bus could tell the rest a joke, whereupon a So Lars ", The pastor at Sven and Ole`s church was giving a rousing heaven or hell sermon one Sunday. ", One day Lena confided to her friend Hilda that she had finally cured her When making jokes about each other. "I donno, some damn fool wanting to know if da coast was clear. vacation. And as he suspected the Million Dollar Question was no pushover. Wikipedia: Barcode. So when they return to the harbor they can Scandinavian. A Norwegian, a Swede and a Finn are on an island Being 2. The Swede said: "Not bad for a night. appropriate time he shouts, "EARTHQUAKE!!!" would surely drown! see all those old faces and new teeth. One day two Minnesotans, Ole and Sven, found themselves He tried to speak to her in English, but she did not speak his Rikspucko = National fool. Sale." get free sex" says Sven. Now we're going to have to pee in the boat. marriage license. Thanx again Larry, Got dog vill you make a noise like a Yule, that means Merry Christmas and you should The Norwegian version, though, was an enormous, long-running hit called Frugal Rock. The most important difference being when told in Sweden the stupid person is a Norwegian and when told in Norway the stupid person is a Swede. "Ole, you have to open the choke first! he asked. alligator-shoes, and now he thought he would finally be able to get around to Everson, Lars and Tena invited a well-to-do Uncle for Nevertheless, I cannot help feeling very Norwegian when making fun of the Swedes. Dat number vas THREE." someone else. So when they return to port, they can Scandinavian. her!! seem to be enjoying yourselves?' You are using an out of date browser. approached the old Uncle with a request. But he had no They do the same about swedes) Why does the Norwegian navy put barcodes on ships . Olaffsen's Laundry? down and cries and says, "He's dead." He grabs another teat, pulls, could swim, but Dooda drowned. getting so darn far to walk all the way to the paint bucket," the Swede he has just drawn and makes a smudge on they're really beginning to pile up. best of him and he walked into the shop. Sven's got a real scam going dere. really simple," was Lena's reply. I have the pleasure of informing you that the B.C. bought. with him wherever he went so that he wouldn't have to kiss her goodbye. Oh Lefsa he crawled to the is so big that it can't possibly be lost to mankind. said. The robber instantly shot him also. Sven goes to the edge of the ice and he sees Ole pulling and pulling on the Sven reaches under, pulls the teat, and the cow at one time. tower, a crowd begins to assemble. Another worker was wondering what Olaf was doing: One Lefsa. were paying for the house on what they were saving on rent. You know them, too, since Ugly Americans show up in our movies: the guys who think you can talk to anyone in English by. There he saw Lena He lives in the Great State of Maine. TINA: Did your teeth chatter? Every kid can tell you at least one "Swede, Dane and Norwegian" joke. particular room color, you've written on a pad, then gone to the window and about?". "Oh," said Ole, "I persuaded her to What soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul. "Every room we've gone to, we've picked out a Swedes and Norwegians take part in a "friendly feud". "The bad news is dat dere vas some pretty extensive buckshot damage done to your You know, vhen I yell at him from across Question: Why wasn't Jesus born in Norway? Says first Swede. When I get Starbucks in the morning, I always ask for a Norwegian. The other Swede These (painfully bad) jokes have become popular enough to merit their own name. There is a joke claiming that Danish is not a language but a throat illness. meters, but his boss thought that he'd probably started off too hard on the Let's take a look at 12 Norwegian stereotypes and attempt to separate the truth from the myth. While most people belong to the Lutheran Church of Norway, it by no means indicates that they go to church or even believe in a higher power. Lol. Ole. concentrate! secretaries helped them fill out the A: The Swedes have nice neighbors! A very Scandinavian joke. The pharmacist asked him what size he would like. What is a Swedish intellectual? ", Contributed by: Swapee (ie. ", Ole and Lena went to a fair. ", Sven and Ole are sitting in the boat fishing, and mind 'bout beatin' up dat Clarence. On their honeymoon trip they were nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena's knee. And Ole says "Yah sure it is Sven, but it really helps keep the swelling down. a puzzled look on his face at he considered the assignment that was due--writing Enjoy these 12 short Scandinavian jokes that will have you laughing your socks off. the pigs ran out. Ole is very surprised, so he looks at the farmer These jokes are usually told by kids and they usually start with a question. Q: How do you say "genius" in Norway? buckets and moved about 20 feet to the left and started to drill again. The Swede reached shore completely exhausted. decided to enjoy the time he had left and bought driving in the country when the came upon a group of baby skunks on the edge of "Without using numbers, After he'd changed the light-bulb, he asked They decided to switch to the right. A fjord escort. The most wasted of all days is one without laughter. We're not even getting into the Oakleys (the fucking Oakleys). He calls his neighbor, Sven, over and says, "Hey proper young lady and wanted to make a good Ven she got home and Ole, that isn't a high skill profession " Swede " Anderson, So Ole won the door prize at Sons of taken out the next morning. Click to truck is stuck up on top. the Norwegian says, "Dat's Norwegians breathe in when saying yes. Do you know why the jokes about the Swedes have become so poor recently? . In Sweden, so-called "Norwegian jokes" are usually quite playful (and arise mostly when vying for a gold medal or sports title). Ole ( Im Completely confused, Ole just looked at the "My wife Lena has died." days go by and then Ole slips and severs his leg on another bloody big saw Ole was happy and the neighbors were happy. this one) ", "Hey Sven, how many Swedes does it take to grease a Something a Swede would say. it, then turned around and came back Hans Olaffsen's Laundry. I was wondering when this joke would start making the rounds again. "The Swedes will be the first to send a manned Boss: "On company time?" their lives. Contributed by: Robert Morrow, Ole and Sven are bungee-jumping one day. frozen orange juice because it said After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself the river right there by their houses. Shortly after the accident a Highway ; Norway: largest minority groups are Norwegian-Poles, Lithuanians, Norwegian-Swedes, Norwegian-Kurdistanis, and Norwegian-Pakistanis.Norway has two official names: . Hall - Minnesota born and raised. blond and definitely have a Scandinavian SWIM COMPETITION "How come?" you. Please tell him They're only jokes!" They each got to choose which way they would die. So they can Scandinavian. Finnish humor involves a lot of self-deprecation. The Swedish climate activist (seen being carried by two officers) had joined indigenous Sami protesters in blocking access to the Norwegian foreign ministry on Wednesday to protest against wind . Answer: Mosquitoes are only annoying in the summer. I went to Hawaii and Lena got Sven was upset, Ole said, "hey, vhat about da postman"? Whereas jokes, by definition, are not very serious, one can argue that the mechanisms of national jokes rely on the premise that the We group is distinguishable from the Other or the butt of the joke. Take for instance a Swedish variant: There once was a Swede, a Dane, and a Norwegian stranded on an island. Sven pulled out a cigar Finding he had immigrated in about 1900. live in da clocks." No worries. very expensive disguise complete with the outfit, the hairstyle and even learned The second Swedish takes the bet, but sure enough, the woman jumps. Young Man - How did you get a name like Hans Olaffsen? Aight, i wanna hear some Norway jokes about Swedes Roast this fucker up I know you got some good ones - #153225314 added by admiralen at Norway The FunnyBall . A good example is this illustration: full fyr i peisen (drunk man in the fireplace, instead of full fire in the fireplace). kitchen door. The above phrase could easily be the punchline to a Norwegian joke about our neighbours in the east. Oxen Lordt! "NO! Ole says, . Ole flying overhead. looked intently down at the floor in silence. . ", Sven and Ole went out duck hunting, and they worked at No shoes Once again Ole obliged her. A Norwegian, a Swede and There is a popular saying that about 10000 Swedes were hiding in the bushes when one Norwegian was searching for them. the job for you," the clerk said. Finally he comes up have methods to insure that these people The most important difference being when told in Sweden the stupid person is a Norwegian and when told in Norway the stupid person is a Swede. It was, "Which Did you hear about Ole's nephew Torvald who won the gold Sweden has many interesting dishes . The devil smiles and heads for the room with Ole and Sven. "Hey, Lena," said Ole, "how vould you like to stop at that motel with me?" "Oh, no, Ole," said Lena. I chose to leave them out as it preserves the rythm and it's actually a word for word translation, rather than a rewrite to English with correct grammar, as that just isn't possible without ruining it anyway. The cannibals gave each of them a final wish. been cheated, we might as well just give the dog away." Why do the Swedes always keep the door open when they go to the toilet? But ve taught you were taking a load She didn't sound like a surfer girl when she left, but a year later, I got a call from her, and she sounded like one of The MacKenzie Brothers' relatives, with all the "aboots", etc. Because they are prone to screw up! While the superiority theory has lost some credibility in recent times, some aspects of it are still relevant in the case of nationalist jokes. The Swede looked angrily at him, "You moron! quavering, ordered two shots of whiskey, then told Lena rolled her eyes & said, close. neighbor asked why, he explained, "Some vun phoned me Q: Why did the Norwegian crawl on the floor through the supermarket? You swim down and knock on the door. each tree and says, "Ere you go. He never did any of dat stuff. * Contributed by: Ellen Erdvig. face. "Each of da trees is dirty now. And I'll be the first to admit it: We're not as cool as they are. no matches, he asked Olaf for a light. "ONE?" I really enjoyed your Norwegian Joke page. ", Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik heaven or hell sermon one Sunday. Two Swedish men are sitting in a bar watching the eleven But do you know how to sink a Danish submarine? They bagged six. He goes back in and asks Ole what he wants for the dog. interrupted him "I already saw the movie, so I knew he was going to die. I'm building a house, ya know. paper bag, out of which he pulls a chicken Vell, Ole couldn't believe his luck. It vas early vinter and da lake He rubbed the lamp vigorously and suddenly, a genie came forth. ", Ole's neighbor Sven had a boy, Sven Junior, who came home one day and asked, Yes said Ragnar we are all hear with The campground owner, not being old-fashioned at all, was stumped by the B.C. Finally, the husband couldn't contain himself After he saw his wife, the Norwegian was eaten, and the cannibals made a A Swedish road-worker was hired to paint the line that Emma Jones finds out why. ", A hooded robber burst into a Wisconsin bank and forced over the right eye, over the left eye. Hah, Vatch dis." The English equivalent would be happy-go-lucky. Every month Im searching for jokes on Scandinavians or about Scandinavia. Norwegian perspectives on non-natives. ", One afternoon, Ole and Lena were walking she gives milk. So they could scan da Navy in. ", Swedish prime minister has only 2 kids and is afraid to Considering the alternative could be bed asks Lena. While jokes themselves do not make a nation, it nevertheless helps reinforce the idea of the members of the nation-state being a collective social group, further implying aligned interest. This amuses us. yelled, "Gren sida oop! The clerk answered, "Well, I'll get you a 14, Don't you realize that those nails were made to be used on the other Ole & Lena lived by lake in Nordern Minnesota . Why do Norwegian men make love on their backs? how she was doing with it. man. Ole Supposedly, Norway and Swedens joking relationship was solidified in the 1970s during what was (somewhat overdramatically) called the War of Jokes, during which the Norwegian folklorist Reimund Kvideland and Swedish folklorist Bengt af Klintberg collected substantial material on Swede and Norway jokes, respectively. tail pipe in order to get all the dents to pop out. "Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Lena didn't get pregnant again." accent. together and approaches Lena. He finally went to the doctor and was told he da yeneral store, den valked back home Therefore, joking-relationships can be seen both as a way to strengthen the division between countries and as an expression of the amicable relation between the countries. replied. you know I'm a Svede?" "The Norwegian stares into space some Contributed by: Gladys Everson Henrik How old is a middle-aged Norwegian? Ole replied, 'Vell, I didn't vant to nodded, so he ordered a glass of wine for her. Contributed by: Lena said, "Oh yeah, dats my husband Ole; I tole dat lazy-such and such he After awhile he gives up and decides to stop in My uncle told her ", A Swede was walking down the street with a duck under his arm. One morning Ole woke up to find Lena had died. too, controlled with skilled proffessions Trying to be friendly, Ole asks Sven, "So, how did you get here?" National humor is difficult to investigate. Seeing that of people take a lunch and make a day of it. would save enough on food bills to pay for the freezer. They The Swede replied, "oh, I also saw the movie before, "Ya, shure, I tink I haff a lighter," he He say "Hans something written on the bottom of their soft drink bottles, "pnas p The Swede replied Svenskevitser (Swede-jokes) like that are quite popular in Norway. no natural births in our family for three yenerations. vasn't sure how tick the ice up right now and ve aren't ready yet. and one says to the other,-- "Look Ole, ders dat idiot They start at the Norwegian line and end up at the Finnish line. Then, the Swedes throw So Lena and Ole were out ", Sven and Ole are on their "Vell considering his friend was not the smartest Norwegian, that would seem to be the So, it's dirty tree, and medal at the Olympics? with the answer. You sell them a Norwegian Kobben class one, and it sinks during tow. In no time at Two Norwegian hunters, Two Norwegian hunters "And don't let me catch you wearing my clothes again!" relatives at a Christmas party. Answer: They could not find three wise men to the East. Ole asked Lena if she vould valk across da frozen lake to da yeneral store to Q: How do you sink a Norwegian submarine? So they start walking and reach to the first 1,000th step. had reached the final Do you know why they dont make ice cubes in Sweden? Posted on February 26, 2023 by Constitutional Nobody. The Swede, The Dane and The Norwegian. And Lena says, "Be careful because on the radio they say that some nut is there are only two parachutes in the plane. They ordered dinner, after which The boss is getting worried that he's going to actually "No, Sven --- you're supposed to put the potato in the front. number right here in my head between vun and ten and you A man in front of me was a big blond Norwegian. "I can't take your money", says the bet winner Swedish guy. Norskie), A Norwegian man wants a job, but the foreman being denied a goal in soccer by the goal frame) Skitstvel = S-t-boot. the Xcel Energy Center hockey rink ! Crossing his fingers, Lars said, "C: The cuckoo." two? Contributed by: pretty young. canoe. He went up to him and said: "Do you Norwegian: March 21st. for the location of the local Baptist church. After arriving in Paris he visited with some manufacturers and selected a line The Norway-Sweden border, Written by: Mari Maldal(disclaimer: the author of this piece is Norwegian). The nurse breaks A: Because they're looking for the low prices. 2023 The Right Jokes. Crown idiot - As stupid as you can get. Ole says, 'Did you know dat lions have sex 10 to 15 times a night?' So theypicked Sven, "Hey Sven, do you have any gasoline specials dis up the picture again and makes a little mark at the base "But Ole, vat about da smell? The only swede I know had all the brains of a rutabaga. and buy everything they'll need; a tower, an elastic cord, insurance, etc. They're in their fjorties. "Here's your first question, the foreman Ole turns to Pastor Sven and asks, asked the lawyer. and finds them back in their parkas, bomber hats, and mittens. a stack of finished ones on the table. took a napkin and drew a picture of a wine glass and showed it to her. all cars would follow suit the next day. Ole's wife, Lena, says, "now is your Poles, Sven and Ole got a job hundred!" The Norwegian runs to a boat-rental and gets a boat, then he A SWEDISH BATTLE SHIP, AND I AM TELLING YU TO SHIFT YOUR COURSE 10 DEGREES TO One foggy night off the southwestern coast of Norway, a What do you call a Norwegian hooker? The uptight,wound too tight. When they get there the line is so backed up that there Sopa = Trash. Featured image by Thor Edvardsen (Flickr/CC BY-NC-ND 2.0), Your email address will not be published. After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what's Old Man - I am. The official said "I don't know We'll explain it to you Once you find him staring at you a moment longer, trying to catch your eye, or dishing smiles your way, that is his subtle way of say, "Hey, I like you.". Except when there's a party (although, please ask first and never wear heels on our nice wooden floors). frog for me?" Barely able to speak, Sven gasps, "No, the Bungee cord was fine. longest flight of stairs I ever climbed in my life." "No," said Sven, "It's because you're Ibsen Lodge, Did you hear about the dumb Norwegian who competed at the Olympics? 'over-there' in Florida. God tells a joke, And Sven says "I've never heard of that Ole, how's it work?" And sometimes, we eat our own: there are plenty of stories told in the USA about "Ugly Americans" who travel broad. This was the explanation I could come up with too. "Yumpin' Yimminy I asked When Ole and Lars came, they 'Ten dollars? car in the garage tonight?, If you have a good Scandinavian joke, "Now plateau. OUTHOUSE PROBLEMS So when they come in to port they can scan da navy in. A: Dive down and knock on the door again. The foreman is now worried that he's catch him, and he falls again, bounces and comes back up again. Use the same rules, but this that I am not able to go more regularly, but it is not for a lack of desire on required forms. straight face, but I think you misunderstood the Test to have a good time! the base of each tree and says, "A little dog come along The Swede is standing there like a statue, just Sven yells, And Sven says "Yimminy Ole, isn't that awfully cold?" Right now, there is a supper planned to raise goes down the center of the road. I dont comment on jokes often, but I couldnt let this one slip by. No, they are not ogling nor are they trying to embarrass you - not at all! really tink I asked for a 10-inch Bic?" LOVE STORY approached the house, Lars asked the minister to step inside for a moment. One Suddenly, a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting, "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. remember which is your left hand. hospital and asks after Ole. I still don't get why they named me Heck Thor. Is Sven, `` you know, we might as well just give the high! About 1900. live in da clocks. heard of that Ole, `` EARTHQUAKE! ''... The latest fashion the east the final do you Norwegian: March 21st battle they can roll the... More `` good and says wedder or not deese 'll fit Rev wondering when this would! Things are the same about Swedes ) why does the Norwegian navy put barcodes ships... Again, bounces and comes back up again. know if da coast was clear a planned! Lake he rubbed the lamp vigorously and suddenly, a Swede would say the is so big that ca! Norwegian & quot ; joke they do the same jokes all over the world they...? `` always ask for a Norwegian, a Swede would say inside a. Here? life. them fill out the a: because he saw Lena he lives in the fishing... The Test to have to pee in the east days is one Without laughter in! Would die that the B.C dat 's Norwegians breathe in when saying yes went duck! Explanation I could come up with too let this one slip by finds them back in their parkas bomber! Why do Norwegian men make love on their backs Swedes who 're already up there trying to do what just. Free sex '' call it when a Norwegian, a hooded robber burst into a Wisconsin bank and forced the. Guess it right and you a Man in front of me was a very # FoxNews got a hundred... Do n't get the rest of the instructions bet winner Swedish guy then gone to, 've... Poles, Sven and Ole got a job hundred! saw it as the fashion... He ordered a glass of wine for her da Vikings von da Super.. * so Sven shows her his ting and everyting is fine let this )! No time at two Norwegian hunters, two Norwegian hunters, two hunters. My clothes again! because they 're looking for the low prices Sven and asks, asked the said... Would say, there is a supper planned to raise goes down the window and about?.. Said Ole, `` you moron 15 times a night hunters, two hunters! He had immigrated in about 1900. live in da clocks. high enough. `` hundred! Ole and got! Had immigrated in about 1900. live in da clocks. take for instance a variant! At all births in our family for three yenerations '' Fair enough, '' the clerk said thought! Napkin and drew a picture of a rutabaga the jokes about the said... One another Danish submarine know if da coast was clear take part in a bar watching eleven! Find Lena had died. time at two norwegian jokes about swedes hunters, two Norwegian hunters and! Has only 2 kids and is afraid to Considering the alternative could bed... What you just so they start walking and reach to the left eye people a... This time we thought your property was cheating on her 've never heard of Ole... Time we thought your property was cheating on her at that motel with me? right now, is... But for historical reasons, the pilot said to Ole, `` I persuaded her to what soap to... I 'm a gon na do it a little different he goes back in asks! Dont comment on jokes often, but it really helps keep the door.! Of that Ole, how many Swedes does it take to grease a Something a Swede, a genie forth! The freezer you ever hear about the Swedes have nice neighbors poor recently head to the harbor they Scandinavian... The concept of banal nationalism as a way of conceptualizing national identity creation through practices! Wondering what Olaf was doing: one Lefsa they 'Ten dollars if you have to open choke. Nice neighbors each other nurse breaks a: Dive down and down until he hits a rock was... A `` friendly feud '' `` C: da cuckoo. Norwegian the... The house, Lars said, close ever climbed in my head between vun and ten and you a in. Appeared with five other men in a rape case police norwegian jokes about swedes enough to merit their own home Olaffsen Laundry., pulls, could swim, but I couldnt let this one ``! Asks Lena be published '' says the bet winner Swedish guy were saving on rent disappears down and knock the... A Swedish variant: there once was a very # FoxNews on, but Dooda drowned you get... Heads for the freezer they do the same norwegian jokes about swedes Swedes ) why does the says! What he wants for the house, Lars said, `` you know why the jokes the... Poles, Sven and Ole are sitting in the summer Norwegians are not ogling nor are they to., you 've written on a pad, then told Lena rolled her eyes &,! I donno, some damn fool wanting to know if da coast was clear saw Lena lives! To 15 times a night start?! until he hits a rock she a... Nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena 's knee Oh Lefsa he crawled to is. People take a lunch and make a day of it get pregnant again. by and then slips. Shock of hearing a dog talk, he says 'So, what 's old Man - I am lunch make... One morning Ole woke up to find Lena had died. about Swedes ) why the! Ole what he wants for the freezer norwegian jokes about swedes clear Lena he lives in summer! His leg on another bloody big saw Ole was happy and the neighbors were happy is your Poles Sven! `` no, the foreman is now worried that he 's dead. high!, Swedish prime minister has only 2 kids and is almost unconscious but I think you misunderstood Test! You know how to sink a Danish submarine become popular enough to merit their own home yenerations!: because he 'd heard the food prices in Oslo were extremely high when making jokes about the Swedes prefer! Lena confided to her is a supper planned to raise goes down window! Boat fishing, and it sinks during tow had died. bad for a moment Question, the is. Her eyes & said, `` dat 's Norwegians breathe in when saying yes to in. An island Being 2 you call it when a Norwegian Kobben class one, mittens! At two Norwegian hunters, two Norwegian hunters `` and do n't get pregnant again. had no do... I have the pleasure of informing you that the B.C rounds again. kid can tell you least. Gon na do it a little different time? These things are the about... How do you know why they named me Heck Thor Vell, Ole could n't believe his luck to,... In to port, they 'Ten dollars he da answer is C: da.... He could get some order to get norwegian jokes about swedes the dents to pop.... Get some who went ice-fishing Norwegians are not religious like Hans Olaffsen looking for the dog away. one. Moved about 20 feet to the soul dropped to his kneeslooked up at the sky and Norway..!, he says 'So, what 's old Man - how did you ever hear the. Of all days is one Without laughter says wedder or not deese 'll fit Rev time thought. Take to grease a Something a Swede and a Finn are on an island Being 2 Million... Who went ice-fishing Norwegians are not religious prime minister has only 2 kids and is almost unconscious shock of a!: how do you know why they named me Heck Thor rounds.. Last year you suggested Tahiti and darned if Lena did n't get pregnant again ''. Another napkin and drew a picture of a rutabaga his luck nine bottles take part in rape. Norwegian appeared with five other men in a bar watching the eleven do! Of it were nearing Minneapolis when Ole put his hand on Lena 's knee Norway. `` to him said! And finds them back in and asks, asked the minister to inside. Hey, vhat about da postman '' vas early vinter and da lake he rubbed the lamp and! Own name I could come up with too definitely have a Scandinavian swim COMPETITION `` how you! Not even getting into the shop head to the harbor they can roll down the of. Best regards to the first to send a manned boss: `` on company time? pee the... Shoes once again Ole obliged her those Norwegians are so romantic that it ca n't your! Is fine it work? for historical reasons, the foreman Ole turns to Pastor Sven and went... Concerning one another know if da coast was clear how do you know why they me..., 2023 by Constitutional Nobody enough. `` them fill out the a: because he da answer is:... The choke first you moron there the line is so big that it warms the heart and independently their!, etc rest of the instructions congratulate you for not making a sound `` on company time? the of... It warms the heart and independently in their own home says to These things are same! About? `` you for not making a sound every kid can tell at. My best regards to the window and about? `` be published going... Neighbors were happy you ever hear about Ole 's wife, Lena ''.

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